*** RANDOMNESS ALERT! MAJOR RANDOMNESS AHEAD!!!***

"No, Naruto's My Best Friend!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Walking down the street toward the food store was none other than the infamous Sasuke Uchiha to buy a bag of rice, untill Iyra ran right into him. (Me: wow, that beginning sucked)

Iyra: Hey Sasuke!

Sasuke: Go away.

Iyra: :< Well fine! I won't tell you something cool! *pulls off a Naruto pout*

Sasuke: Good, I don't want to hear it.

Iyra: Okay! I'll tell you! ^^

Sasuke: -_-#

Iyra: Hey, Sasuke! Sasuke! Did you know that Naruto can grant anyone's greatest desire as long as they're his best friend?

Sasuke: Naruto can do that?

Iyra: Do what?

Sasuke: Grant people's desires if they're his best friend.

Iyra: Oh, you already know that? Oh well. i guess I won't need to tell you the details! ^^

Sasuke: No! No, no, no, no, no! Please tell! I believe the details have slipped my mind.

(Later, at the training grounds)

Sasuke: Let go, Sakura! He's my best friend! *pulling on one of Naruto's arms*

Sakura: I'm sorry, Sasuke, but no! He's my best friend! *pulling on Naruto's other arm*

Sasuke: I need more power to kill my brother!

Sakura: I need you to fall in love with me so we can get married and have children!!!!

Naruto: Don't I get a word in this?

Sasuke & Sakura: NO!!!!

(Somewhere at the Akatsuki base)

Itachi: *reading the "Rouge News"* Kisame, pass the OJ.

Kisame: *in a apron* Alright. Here ya go.

Itachi: *takes a sip and spits it out all over the table* Kisame!

Kisame: What? Is the OJ spoiled again? I told Zetsu that the orange was dead already and he should keep it in the fridge!!! >.<

Itachi: No, no! It's not that! Look at this! Naruto Uzumaki, formally known as the Kyuubi container, is now known for granting the truest desires of his best friend. Source of information is unknown.

Kisame: ...

Itachi: ...

Kisame & Itachi: WE GOTTA KIDNAP HIM!!!

(5 seconds later, at the training feilds)

Kisame & Itachi: *pop out of a puff of smoke* HAND NARUTO OVER, NOW!!!!

Sasuke: Big brother! *glare*

Itachi: Foolish little brother, hand over the Kyuubi!

Sasuke: No! Your not kidnapping him!

Kisame: We're not going to kidnap him.

Naruto: Huh, your not?

Itachi: Nope

Naruto: Then why are you here?

Itachi & Kisame: BECAUSE WE'RE YOUR BESTFRIENDS!

Sakura: No he's not! He's my bestfriend !

Sasuke: No! He's mine!

Everyone gets in a fight and Naruto sees the chance to sneek away.

???: Uh-u-um, N-na-na-naruto?

Naruto: *looks up* Oh, hi Hinata! ^^

Hinata: N-n-na-naruto?

Naruto: What? Is there something you want to tell me?

Hinata: NARUTO! I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABIES!!!

Naruto: o.0 Uh...um, well, uh...Gottagobye! *runs like hell*

Hinata: ...did I over due it?

(somewhere in the sound)

Kabuto: *in a red lingerie* Oreo, ready for bed?

Orochimaru: Kabuto!

Kabuto: Oh! Oreo! Is something wrong?!

Orochimaru: Naruto can grant our greatest desire if we're his bestfriend!

Kabuto: But honeybunch! We already have all our greatest desires! ^^

Orochimaru: No! We don't! We don't have Sasuke! Oh, the things I could do! The pleasures! Oh---.

Kabuto: What?!!! I'm not good enough for you?!

Orochimaru: Kabuto! We have to kidnap that boy!

(back in Konoha)

Naruto: *hiding in a porti-pottie* Oh. At least I'm safe! *sigh of relief*

Orochimaru pops inside the porti-pottie

Orochimaru: Naruto! Nice to see you again! >:)

Naruto: OROCHIMARU!!!

Orochimaru: Yes, my friend, I am Orochimaru! >:)

Naruto: ... did you just say my friend?

Orochimaru: Yes. In fact, I did! ^^

Naruto: ... RUN AWAY!!!! (hauls @$$)

Naruto runs all the way through town, Meanwhile...

Kabuto: *strangling Sasuke* ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, OREO DOESN'T LIKE MY WARMTH AT HIS BEDSIDE ANYMORE! DIE!!!

Back with Naruto

Naruto: *running from everyone in the village* AAAHHH!!!

Choji: Come back, Naruto! I want a life-time supply of potato chips!

Shika: Naruto! I want a luxury pillow to sleep on where ever I go!

Kiba: DOGGIE TREATS!!!

Shino: BUG PROTECTION LAWS!!!

Naruto: WAHHH!!!!

Naruto turns a corner and hides in a nearby dumpster while everyone runs off

Naruto: Woo! Everyones gone!

???: Not everyone.

*Ichigo from Bleach is in the dumpster with Naruto*

Ichigo: Your mine!

Naruto: Nooouuuu!!!! *jumps out*

???: There he is mates!

Naruto turns around to see Jack Sparrow, Captain Hook, Light and L from Deathnote, Sousuke and Kurs form Full Metal Panic, Megatron, and Kermit the frog, and several other peeps from random shows and animes at the corner and start to dash after Naruto.

Naruto runs and bumps into Gaara.

Naruto: GAARA! HIDE ME!!!

Gaara: Why?

Naruto: THEY ALL THINK THAT I WILL GRANT THEIR GREATEST DESIRE IF THEY'RE MY BEST FREINDS! NOW HIDE ME!

Gaara: Oh...That thing. Hold on.

Gaara steps out.

Gaara: EVERYONE!!! Who heard this little rumor first?

Sasuke: *raises hand*

Gaara: Who told you?

Sasuke: Iyra.

Iyra pops out of nowhere

Iyra: Hi yall!!! What cha up too?

Everyone: IYRA!!!

Iyra: What? Did everyone miss me? Oh my! I didn't know I was so loved! ^^

Gaara: What's this thing about Naruto granting everybody's desires?

Iyra: Oh! I read it online! An online book! Everyone called it a "fan-fiction!"

Naruto: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!!! I WAS CHASED ALL AROUND KONOHA BY EVERYONE, EVEN SOME GUYS THAT AREN'T EVEN IN THIS SHOW, JUST BECAUSE YOUR BRICK FOR A BRAIN THOUGHT THAT STORY WAS REAL?!!!!

Iyra: Yeah. Pretty much.

Naruto: *eye twitches then he snaps* I'M GOING TO FLIPPING MURDER YOU!!!  *chases Iyra*

Iyra: *running for her life* Can't we talk this over?

Naruto: *foaming at the mouth and pulls out a chainsaw*

Everyone stares at the murder scene that is going on before them.

Shikamaru: That was troublesome. *pulls pillow out from behind his back and falls asleep*